Perv

The weirdest thing happened in Church last Sunday.

As quite a few of you know, I do regular Sunday worship at Bread. I went there and sat at my usual seat beside a guy who had this odd-looking hair (remember Wowie de Guzman's hair during his Juday-Wowee days?). He looked dirty, and he looked more odd when you look at him amidst a pool of people on their best Sunday attire. He looked weird by the way. Pockmarks, chapped lips, oily skin and hair, his shirt was dirty and his shoes were too big for his feet.

Anyways, at the very beginning of this worship, this guy kept glancing at me. During the prayer before sermon, I could feel his elbows touching mine. I didn’t mind coz the place was jam-packed and the chairs shared armrests. During the whole sermon, he kept on touching my elbows and I kept on avoiding it. It came to a point when I intentionally crossed my arms so to give him the idea that I was not comfortable with his gestures.

I would glance at him and he would smile. His teeth were crooked and if I wasn’t in Church, I wouldve snapped and tell him right to his face that he should see a dentist, or brush his yellow teeth at the very least.

But no. Instead I focused on the Pastor's sermon, with my arms crossed super close to my chest almost right below my chin actually. If someone who knew passed by and saw me, he would assume that I was chilling. I did this so he couldn’t touch me AT ALL.

When he noticed that he didn’t have access to my elbows, he then used his legs to touch mine. The chair was big, and he had short legs, so he looked peculiar stretching his legs far out just to reach mine. I crossed my legs and pointed them to the direction opposite his. He stretched his legs too, this time, his legs were already occupying half the floor area right in front of my chair.

If I could just squeeze myself into one small ball, I would do it.

The agony lasted until the end of service. I just found it so unusual that these kinds of people do exist. Im not trying to come out clean, I mean I do have some naughty moments at a public place too. But my god, we're in a Church for goddsakes!

Next Sunday I swear Im gonna sit beside the choir.