One more shot of tequila please.

One shot of tequila…

This sucks. I sit down empty.

One more shot of tequila please.

If you know me well as person, you'll know that I'm never really a hard drinker. I drink beer occasionally and that's it. Alcohol could never solve problem, nor does it give you the answers. The thought of the agony of a hang-over the next day is excruciating enough. But tonight is different.

One more shot of tequila please.

I feel it warming my gut, and tears start to fill up my eyes. I let out a sob. My friend pats me in the back and I'm trying trying so so so hard not to cry even more. I'm gonna cause a scene and it's not gonna be cute. Nonetheless, my emotions took the better of me.

One more shot of tequila please.

I had a million questions in my head. I try to keep an open mind on everything but the more I come up with possibilities, the more I get confused. Why? I never expected this. Is there no love in the world for me? Am I jinxed?

One more shot of tequila please.

Why do heartaches have to come more than once? I've had enough heartaches up my sleeves already. Look, I'm just an ordinary guy okay? I don't need to learn and experience all these trials coz it's not like I'll make a career as a love guru one day, duh. I feel stupid.

One more shot of tequila please.

If I could just hold his hand right now. If I could just give him a good reason to stay. Why can't you stay anyway? Is it the sex? Am I getting too fat? Do I snore too loudly in bed? Do I nag worse than your mother? Is it because I don't play Sims like you?

One more shot of tequila please.

My friend pats me at the back again. I let out one big cry of defeat. Enough, I said. I'd like to think I'm all cried out but hell I'm not yet done. I can’t stop. You said it would be easy for us to part ways. You've got a life, I've got mine--- it'll be easy to move on. How can it when I'm seriously in love with you? Wait where's my cell?

One more shot of tequila please.

The bottle's almost done but I still haven't found the answers. No please, not one more bottle. I turned and saw the bar people looking at me. The stupid craptards gave me a sympathetic look I want to spit at their faces. Go dance and leave me alone.

One more shot of tequila please.

I'm starting to feel dizzy. This is crazy. I never saw this sh*t coming. I thought we were gonna end up happy together. Turns out you're not the one and I'm back to the old crap I once knew. I thought I learned.

One more shot of tequila please.

My friend pats me at the back again. I'm finally done crying. My sobs are making me more dizzy so I have to stop. My friend starts to say the same old litany I heard a couple of years back--- "I know why this is--- he's too intimidated by you. I mean look at you--- you're young, smart and attractive--- Kitiboi he doesn't deserve you". At this point I wanna puke. These lines make me puke.

One more shot of tequila please.

I still haven't found the answers, and at any point I'm gonna snap. I've got tequila coming out of my nose and it's not good. One thing is for sure though. It's time to end this crap--- it's time to let go. It's time to put it all behind me. One day I'll grow so numb and I'll recall this day and laugh at how stupid I was.

I hope that day's gonna be tomorrow. Or any day next week.

God make it really soon.

But for now---

One more shot of tequila please.